Thursday, August 28, 2014

Five on Friday


It's time for 5 on Friday! This week's edition is my top 5 favorite apps on my phone. I have a Samsung GalaxyS4, and it runs the Android operating system

1. RunKeeper

This app is MAGIC!! RunKeeper lets you keep track of those miles you walk or run. I love RunKeeper because not only does it have a GPS feature where I can map my miles, but it also syncs with My Fitness Pal. What? WHAT?! Yep. Magic.

2. My Fitness Pal

My Fitness Pal is a great tool for anyone wanting to watch what the eat. It's great for tracking weight loss and even inches lost. You can customize macros for whatever goal you have in mind. The database of foods is HUGE. Be careful, as some foods may not be entirely accurate in fat, carb, vitamin, etc content. It's user based so people can technically put whatever they want, and some do because they like trolling ya.

3. Expense IQ

Expense IQ is a great app for balancing your bank account. It's not limited to being a checkbook register, though! You can also use Expense IQ to set up bill reminders and your very own budget. This app lets me see where I'm spending money and where I can make some cut backs.

4. Starbucks
I know. I know. I know. Starbucks is expensive. Blah, blah, blah. I don't go there every day. It's bad for you and bad for your wallet. The app is pretty handy because you can link up your Starbucks gift card. This feature makes it simple and quick to pay. It also gives you access to any coupons and keeps track of any rewards you've earned. You can also reload your card from the app using PayPal. So handy!

5. Swiftkey

I use the SwiftKey app exclusively on my phone. I cannot stand the stock keyboard on my Galaxy S4. I have to hit the tiny keys exactly on the mark in order to type out anything. I can't tell you how many times I hit the back button only to but six million letter Ls. The letter L is great, but I didnt need it!! Swiftkey solves that problem for me. The keys on most of the keyboards are quite a bit larger. I also love that you can customize the layout and color schemes.

"I Get Knocked Down...."

"but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down!"

I have gained back twenty of the nearly sixty pounds lost. I have no one to blame but myself. I hate myself.

I'm not angry about putting on the weight. I'm upset with all of the negative talk in my head. It's so hard to look in the mirror and not hate what I see staring back. There's a lot of difficulty in looking at my closet and seeing the clothes I had just purchased, which no longer fit. Glimpses of my double chin coming back. Noticing and cringing when I see my arms aren't as lean and defined as they were. I was just starting to truly feel good in my own skin. I felt pride. Now, the opposite.

With these thoughts comes another fear: slipping into a dark place I haven't been in for a while. You can go here to read more. Anyone who has battled with eating disorders knows there is often a very fine line of watching what you eat and going to the extreme.  I feel like I am teetering on that edge. Afraid to move. Paralyzed. If I eat that bite, will it be the one that sends me over the edge? Better not eat breakfast so I can have more calories later in the day.

The difference between now and then? I am self aware. I correct myself. Skipping breakfast is flat out dumb. It is the most important meal of the day. Eat the damn cookie. If I feel guilty, I get my butt up and walk on the treadmill for a bit. Goodness knows I have a lot of time to do that. I'm working on getting the negative thoughts out. I know the only way to avoid falling into old habits is to kick the evil to the curb.

My worth isn't determined by the size of my frame or clothes in my closet. I am beautiful no matter my size. My health (physical and mental) is most important. The only size that matters in this life is the size of our hearts.

Monday, August 25, 2014

Weekly Recap 08/17/2014

Changed to run 2min, walk 3min after 25 min of walking. Hip felt great. Knees weren't really happy with me. Heck. It felt good to run.

Same as last workout but ran at 5.6mph. Hip is fine when exercising but hurts any other time. Knee was horrendous. Shortened stride and pain eased a bit.

Dang, it's warm!! Felt good to take this one outdoors. I have no clue my speeds and my run times were over two a bit. Hip is the same. Knee hurt a lot for the first run portion but was fine the second and third.

Friday, August 22, 2014

"And Now it's Time to Build From the Bottom of the Pit...."

".....Right to the top. Don't hold back."

The injuries to my hip and knee have been the biggest personal set backs for me since I have started running. Due to issues with our insurance provider, I won't be able to seek treatment for either for a couple more weeks. This has been incredibly frustrating and defeating. I've spent the entire summer not doing something I love. Something that makes me feel so alive. Something that relieves stress and frees my mind and soul. 

It's time. It was time to get over it, put my big girl pants and get back out on the road (or treadmill). You have to walk before you can run. To me, walking was giving up. Walking is not running. Me. Who told countless people walking is great! It's still moving. Be proud. I ran a flipping marathon, and now, I'm going to walk?? Yep. 

It was time to start from the bottom. I dusted off the treadmill, dug out my running shoes and put my pride in check. I know I'm not going to be running nine minute miles any time soon. There are zero races in my foreseeable future. For the first time in two years, I'm out of shape. (Let's not get into the 20 LBs I added....) I finally convinced myself to walk. Give my body time to strengthen. Boy, did I need it! 

Walking isn't running, but it really is better than nothing. It's been very gratifying to see the mileage go up bit by bit and see the pace quicken along the way. This week, I decided to try a two minute run. Yes. Two ridiculously minuscule minutes. It was Heaven. Pure ecstasy. 

I'm not BACK back, yet. I will be. I have to give it time. Time. Time. Time. There's not a lot of it, but we have to use it wisely. Be smart. I want to run fast and far, but I'll wait. If I rush this, I'll find myself walking longer than I want.