Sunday, February 21, 2010

Don't Forget

On the outside it would appear I haven't done much with my life. I'm a college drop out. I was a teen mother. I married young. I divorced young. I was never married when any of my children were conceived. I work in a dead end job. I make just above minimum wage. I don't have a luxury car. I don't have designer clothes. I don't attend church. I don't live in a mansion or a gated community. Sometimes I go a week with out cleaning my house.

I am not perfect. I am just me. I do what I know how to do. I may not do it well, and you may not approve. I may not do anything you are proud of. I may not have accomplished what you think I should. I may be a loser in your eyes. I may even be a failure and a disappointment. Feel free to cast your judgments and your disdain.

But don't forget what I have done.

Don't forget I graduated high school. I did not just squeak by. I graduate with honors.

Don't forget I finished two years of college. I left school in good standing and with good grades. I left school to pursue something more important to me: a happy family. I knew I couldn't be the mom I needed to be if I stayed in school. My family came first.

Don't forget my first marriage and my divorce taught me more about myself than I ever could have hoped to learn. I came away from the relationship with two fabulous children. I came away knowing I could make it. I could be happy. My marriage may have failed, but I am not a failure.

Don't forget I have do have morals. I'm not less of a human for not being married when my children were conceived. I wasn't a whore. Those are the only two relationships I have been in and for different reasons and at different times, they were very important to me. I did things out of order, but still came out with good results.

Don't forget I do love my job. It comes with little pay and little acknowledgment. The satisfaction I have is knowing the positive impact I am making on society. I am influencing the future. Yes, it may be at the very beginning stages, but it is still important none the less.

Don't forget material objects are just things. I don't need the best. I don't even want the best. I take only what I must have and that is enough for me.

Don't forget a clean house doesn't really make a happy home. I can go a week without cleaning. What is more important? Spending two hours scrubbing floors or spending two hours with my family? Which is going to be more fulfilling in the end?

Don't forget I am happy. Don't forget even though you may not accept my life, I do. Don't forget I chose this life for myself, and I have no regrets. Don't forget I did make mistakes, but I learned from them. If I hadn't learned anything from them, then I would be a failure. Don't forget, I don't need your approval. Don't forget, I'm not going to live my life to impress you or make you happy. Don't forget, you may never see me as amazing, but some one out there does. Don't forget that someone sees my potential and sees my accomplishments as unimportant as they may seem to you.

Don't you dare forget any of this.

The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.


My Husband's Watching TV... said...

Great post! Sometimes I go more than a week cleaning...I can't tell you the last time we scrubbed floors!

Jennelle said...

LOVE this post!

Beckie said...

I love this post! You are an incredible woman! You saw my bathroom, so you know how my cleaning can be! And I would never forget you!

Angie said...

Beautiful post. Makes me feel like someone said or did something hurtful to you recently, and that is sad. Keep your chin up and remember what's really important isn't what other people think.

Mary said...

A working mom has the hardest job in the world in my book. I agree with Angie-I hope no one said anything rude to you to prompt you to write this post. And I hear you about cleaning. Sometimes other things are more important.

Anonymous said...

Crap, still can't remember my damn password LOL - I agree with everyone, you are one of the most wonderful women I have ever met, your house always looks clean to me, you're a great mom and wife, and most importantly to me, a great friend who I'm very proud to have. I really hope no one hurt you to put this on here. And if they did, I'm gonna take a little trip and kick some ass ;) love you girl!

Angie, aka Durb, Durbin, whatever LOL

my4angels said...

Wow....You are NOT a faliure. You have a beautiful family, a wonderful husband, the best job....only you can make you happy. You live one life and make it the life worth living! I love having you as a sister. I don't consider you an in-law, just a sister! Love you!