Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Totally Random Tuesday

-- In regards to my last post, nothing in particular triggered me to write it. The post was a long time in the making. I've had those feelings held in my for quite some time, and I was ready to get them out.

-- Thank you so much for your support and kind words. I really appreciate it.

-- I am dead tired. We spent the weekend in Illinois with my sister and her family. We left Sunday morning at 2 after we got back to her place from the bar. (Don't worry. My hubby and I didn't drink.) We had to leave because a snow storm came in early. We couldn't get stuck up north. My little bro had to work Sunday night. So, D drove a third of the way and got us out of the snow. I took the wheel and drove the rest. We picked the kiddos up at 7 am and then headed home. I drove again. I tried napping but Crash would have none of it.

-- I'm still catching up on sleep. I haven't even slept in my bed since last Thursday. I fall asleep on the couch and that's it for me. I wake up a million times, but I know I am way too tired to even attempt to carry Crash to bed.

-- The flu bug hit our house hard. Crash had it a couple of weeks ago. He finally kicked the lingering bits of it. My hubby was stricken Sunday. Grace and Tater caught in Sunday night.

-- Because of said flu bug, I have been doing ridiculous amounts of laundry and scrubbing everything.

-- A preschool in our area closed and we took in a lot of their kids. I have been bumped back up to full time hours!!! We are so relieved!!

-- Crash has been moved out of my class. My boss finally took notice that my son does not behave for me at all and she decided to move him up. He was not pleased at first, but he did great the second part of the day. We have a policy about staff kids not being in their mom's class, but we had no where to put him. He is the youngest in his class and he will be in that class for a while, but I think it will be better for the both of us.

-- We are looking at refinancing our home. We want to see if we can get a better rate and knock down some of the PMI. I'm not going to hold my breath.

-- We finally got our Roku box and Netflix. LOVES IT!!! We haven't even watched the satellite since we got it. I think it's time to kick DirecTv to the curb.

-- I am soooooo tired of watching Monsters Inc. It was good the first 20 million times. I'm so over it now.

-- I got back into crocheting!! I am so excited. My mom came down to give me a refresher course. I am working on a blanket right now. Hopefully, I actually finish it.

-- I apologize for not commenting on blogs. I swear I am reading them. I feel awful when I don't comment, but I've been too tired to actually sit at the computer and write. I check up on all of you on my iPhone. I like to see how all my bloggy friends are doing! I love you all so much!!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Don't Forget

On the outside it would appear I haven't done much with my life. I'm a college drop out. I was a teen mother. I married young. I divorced young. I was never married when any of my children were conceived. I work in a dead end job. I make just above minimum wage. I don't have a luxury car. I don't have designer clothes. I don't attend church. I don't live in a mansion or a gated community. Sometimes I go a week with out cleaning my house.

I am not perfect. I am just me. I do what I know how to do. I may not do it well, and you may not approve. I may not do anything you are proud of. I may not have accomplished what you think I should. I may be a loser in your eyes. I may even be a failure and a disappointment. Feel free to cast your judgments and your disdain.

But don't forget what I have done.

Don't forget I graduated high school. I did not just squeak by. I graduate with honors.

Don't forget I finished two years of college. I left school in good standing and with good grades. I left school to pursue something more important to me: a happy family. I knew I couldn't be the mom I needed to be if I stayed in school. My family came first.

Don't forget my first marriage and my divorce taught me more about myself than I ever could have hoped to learn. I came away from the relationship with two fabulous children. I came away knowing I could make it. I could be happy. My marriage may have failed, but I am not a failure.

Don't forget I have do have morals. I'm not less of a human for not being married when my children were conceived. I wasn't a whore. Those are the only two relationships I have been in and for different reasons and at different times, they were very important to me. I did things out of order, but still came out with good results.

Don't forget I do love my job. It comes with little pay and little acknowledgment. The satisfaction I have is knowing the positive impact I am making on society. I am influencing the future. Yes, it may be at the very beginning stages, but it is still important none the less.

Don't forget material objects are just things. I don't need the best. I don't even want the best. I take only what I must have and that is enough for me.

Don't forget a clean house doesn't really make a happy home. I can go a week without cleaning. What is more important? Spending two hours scrubbing floors or spending two hours with my family? Which is going to be more fulfilling in the end?

Don't forget I am happy. Don't forget even though you may not accept my life, I do. Don't forget I chose this life for myself, and I have no regrets. Don't forget I did make mistakes, but I learned from them. If I hadn't learned anything from them, then I would be a failure. Don't forget, I don't need your approval. Don't forget, I'm not going to live my life to impress you or make you happy. Don't forget, you may never see me as amazing, but some one out there does. Don't forget that someone sees my potential and sees my accomplishments as unimportant as they may seem to you.

Don't you dare forget any of this.



The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost


TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Ameren Can Suck It

This is my interpretation of the lame radio ads that Ameren is putting out.

"Hi. I'm Mr. Douche Bag. We here at Ameren know you are tired of the other broad talking, so we decided I would do the honors. Maybe if you hear someone else talking about how bad you're getting fucked, you will be more accepting and understanding. We don't feel bad for anally raping you in your electric rates. We had to raise your rates to cut limbs and trees and shit. We should have been doing it before, but we were too busy spending your money on important things like hookers and beer. If you give us more money, we will take care of those trees. You are still going to lose power though. We pretty much suck at our jobs and have no idea what the fuck we are talking about. We are going to continue to spend money on these radio ads because that's important too. We could probably use that money to cut down some more trees, but that would be silly. We wouldn't be able to jack up your prices more. Raising the rates is a good thing. You are going to reduce your consumption so you don't have to pay more. But..........if you do that, we are going to have to fuck you harder because we still will need more money. Those trees don't stop growing ya know. Thank you so much for letting me waste your precious time with all this garbage I've been spewing. Have a great day."

:o) Now I really don't hate Ameren. I just think it's funny they are justifying rate hikes because they need to cut down limbs. Did these limbs just magically appear?? So you didn't cut down limbs before??? And why do you feel it necessary to take out ads all the time telling us this? It's not going to make us feel any better. We are going to be really pissed when you spent all that money so you could cut limbs to help us from losing power and we end up losing power any way.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Well, that's just shitty.

It was. Really shitty. REALLY, REALLY shitty. And it was EVERYWHERE. Crash has a had a little bit of a tummy virus. It caused him to vomit a couple of times and he had just a few runny bowel movements. I was by no means concerned. He was not dehydrated. He's good.

This morning I woke up and did my normal routine. A couple of minutes before I leave, I go up and grab Crash to take him to work with my. I bundle him up and off we go. Normally. I heard him at the top of the stairs crying. Crud. He's in a bad mood. I run up to get him and head out. I can smell that he pooed. Ok, I will just hurry up and change him. A couple of minutes isn't going to hurt me. I will still make it in time to open the day care. I pick him up and I immediately feel something warm. Crud. His diaper leaked. Pee every where. I go downstairs and lie him down. This is when I see it is NOT urine. It's shit. Crap. I run upstairs to grab him another outfit. I decide to look in my room to see if there was any leakage onto my bed because that's where he was sleeping. Yep. There's shit in my bed. And on my hubby's pillow. And on the carpet. And in the hall. Crap. I grab all of the dirty linens. I'm thinking I can toss most of them in the wash and still make it for work.

I run to change Crash. I'm trying to wipe up the poo but it just spreads. Crap. The diaper was so full it leaked all over the floor. It was in the blanket he had wrapped around himself. He had poop all over him. Crap. Panic mode sets in. There is NO way I am going to clean all of this up and make it to the day care on time. I immediately freak, but I'm neurotic. Well, I can't just leave all this shit every where. Ew. Time to call L and beg her to open for me because of the shit bomb that went off at my house. She said she would. God bless her. She managed to get herself and her three boys there in 20 minutes. She's my hero.

Back to poo poo head. I take the rest of his clothes off and tell him he is going to have to take a bath. "I don't want a bath. I don't want a bath." Weeeeeeel, you don't have a choice buddy. You have poop on your head. I give him a good scrub down, dry him off and get him dressed. I put him on the couch to just chill while I try to bust ass cleaning up the rest of the shit. I grabbed the closest cleaner and spray disinfectant and went to town. That's all finished. I look at myself. Yep. More crap. So I have to clean off again and try to find another pair of pants. I only have on pair of work pants because I'm too fat for the rest. Lol. I found some that didn't have a button, so I threw on a belt to help keep them closed. And with that, I am finally out the door.

Yes, I cried. I lot. Not because of the mess, but because of the headache it caused. I felt horrible. L was cool though. She told me to chill out and quit worrying. Lol. I did at about 2 pm. :o)

I hope I don't have another shitty day for a while.

Friday, February 12, 2010

One of Those Days

You know you've had one. The kind of day that just starts off on the wrong note and seems to go downhill from there. I had one of those days today. It's coming to an end, finally.

It all began when I realized I was out of creamer for my coffee. I know I could use milk, but it really just isn't the same. I would be greatly disappointed if I had done that any how. So, no cup of coffee to get me going. Bummer.

I pile all of the kids into the van and off to work we go. Yes, it is a blast getting three kids ready to leave the house at 5:15 a.m. Too much fun. We get a mile from the house and I realize I forgot my coat. Suck. This normally wouldn't be a big deal but for the fact we had a van run to do at work. The van does not have a properly working heater. Sweet. I also had to walk the other group of kids to the bus stop. Perfect.

In the midst of all my freezing, a Face Book update arrives on my phone. It's from my mom. The last of our childhood pets passed away some time during the night. Crap. Let me give you a little back story on our pooch, Muffy. We first met Muffy at the park on a Saturday. It just happened to be the birthday of my grandma who passed away some years ago. My mom was FURIOUS with us for playing with a stray. Guess she thought we would get fleas. Or rabies. The next day, my brothers and I were playing outside. Would you believe what we saw walking up to our backyard? The same dog from the park. Now, we lived a couple of miles from the park. We knew it was the same dog because she had a little gray patch on the top of her head. We just KNEW this dog was meant to be ours. Long story cut shorter: we kept her. She had a great life and was one of the best dogs ever. She loved babies and watched over all of the grandchildren. Muffy passed away February 11 or 12. How is this for freaky? My grandma passed away on February 10. No joke. I know it sounds weird, but we sort of believed this dog was sent to us. It was like grandma watching over us. I know it sounds silly, but those are two really big coincidences.

So, now I'm bummed. Poor Muffster is gone. Crap. I'm going to have to tell my kids. They adored Muffy. They were heartbroken. Grace cried and Tater nearly cried. I felt awful. I didn't say anything to Crash because he won't understand. He is going to have a hard time because he used to go to my parents' house and curl up in the dog bed with Muffy. :o(

This is all before 8:00 a.m. Next up: girl who is potty training poops in her pull up. Not a huge deal until I realize she stuck her hand in it and wiped it on her pants. Eff me. I change her and clean her up nicely. Icky. I promptly send her to the bathroom. A few minutes after visiting the pisser, she pisses. In her pants. Double eff me. Sooooooo, I change her again.

In walks my hubs. He wanted to cheer me up so he brought me a cookies and cream cappuccino and chocolate!
I told him that I was thinking about maybe leaving work early. He mad a sad face. I asked why. He likes to "jam". Jam as in playing the guitar at really annoying levels not as in jelly. Ok, that's fine. We could really use the money any way.

After we get the kids onto their cots, the UPS man arrived with this:

Tulips!! There was also a small box of Russell Stover Chocolates, but those disappeared. Into my belly. Here is the note that accompanied it:
"Happy Valentines Day! You know that I think flowers are a waste of money, but the smile on your face and the tears in your eyes are priceless. I love you always and forever.....Your husband, Danny" :o)
I was smiling and crying. Hehehehehe.

After I received my flowers, I headed home. D was still awake by the time we made it here. Crash and I went upstairs to visit. On the table was a gift bag with a cute little pink bear sticking out the top. :o) Giggles and squeals. This is what he got me:

(Sorry. Too lazy to rotate it.)

I'm getting a mini spa day!!! I am sooooo excited. I've never had a manicure, pedicure or facial. I'm so pumped. He is so sweet. After a really shitty day, it was nice to get my Valentine's presents early. He definitely made my day. I'm a lucky lady.

The afternoon had one other down point. I went shopping with Crash. We hit the second store and he started spewing. Ugh. Luckily, I brought his blanket in with us for some reason other wise he would have made a huge mess. I cut the shopping adventure short and returned home. I felt it was perfectly ok to go ahead and order pizza for dinner. I can justify ANYTHING. The bright spot is that Crash hasn't gotten sick and seems to be fine. Could have been the hiccups I suppose. We shall attempt shopping again in the morning. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Nosey Neighbor

I am. Sort of. This is purely my speculation and absolutely none of my business. However, I do feel the need to get other opinions. Here's the situation:

I have a female neighbor in her mid thirties who lives alone. She has a male visitor that shows up on random days. Now, I'm not going to knock a girl for getting her freak on. To each their own. I do have a few questions.

1. Why does he park in the garage?
2. Why does he close the garage immediately after he arrives?
3. Why does he only stay for a few minutes most days?
4. Why does he come over at odd times?
5. Why does he do a drive around if there are cars parked in the cul-de-sac?

Now, the way I see it it, there are two possibilities.
1. He is a higher up in the school district and she is a teacher in the school. This sort of relationship may be frowned upon?
----- But, if that were the case, wouldn't he at least come over more frequently?
2. He's married or otherwise betrothed.
----- In my mind, this seems to be the most logical explanation. It explains the odd times, the length of time he stays and the sneaking around.

Of course, I could be completely wrong and none of the above is true. Maybe he's her pimp. Lol. Any thoughts on the soap opera next door??

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Sunshiney Day

The fabulous Alyssa over at My Husband's Watching T.V. gave me another award! Sweet!! I feel so special when I get these. Plus, it gives me something to blog about and is a great way to find other blogs.

Now since I received this fabulous award, I get to share it!!! First off though, the rules:
-Copy that little orange flower pic and put it on your blog when you post about your award!
-Pass the award on to 7 other bloggers.
-Let the nominees know that they have been honored by leaving a comment on their blog (we all love comments!)
-Share the love and link to the person who nominated you!


I would pass the award, but the only other person I know of is Angie G, and she doesn't blog much. I'm trying to whip her into shape!! :o)